Save Money For me

Save money for Goddess Godiva

Some of you losers are fortunately blessed but, most of you are barely scraping by or unfortunately poor. It just highlights how much more of a failure you really are. Thank Goddess I’m here. I’ll show you that even a doughless doughboy like yourself can turn himself into a prime piggy bank for Me to break! It doesn’t matter if you actually make a nice buck for Me to take – there are ALWAYS ways to SAVE and SEND MORE MORE MORE!

Below are a few suggestions on how you can become a more disciplined devotee… and in turn — a happier and more satisfied devotee, as you will be contributing to the glamorous life of a superior female — ME!

TRANSFER YOUR SAVINGS TO ME

Many of my slaves have done a fair job of saving money over the years, collected in the form of savings accounts, retirement accounts, stocks and bonds, CDs, savings bonds or family trusts. Those slaves have made it much easier to form a proper Goddess-slave relationship with me, as they have the start-up capital required to financially sustain my needs and desires. Other slaves may not have had a reason before to save money and that is fully understandable. You had no use for money until you found your Princess and now that I have accepted you into my Queendom, you will work diligently to save, save and save some more for me.

One of the simplest ways of transferring your savings to me is by scheduling a regular tribute from your bank account to Mine. Set up a transfer on a recurring basis and watch with delighted anticipation each week as your savings dwindles bit by bit, while mine grows and grows! For instant gratification, you may prefer to cash out a CD, stock or savings bond and tribute the whole amount to ME at once! I never turn down such thoughtful gestures from my slaves and it shows that you are truly serious about serving Me to the highest degree.

ESTABLISH A DAILY SAVINGS PLAN FOR ME

Similar to how many financial self-help guides instruct you to put aside money every day by foregoing that daily Starbucks, this plan allows you to start a simple and progressive method of saving for me, gradually building up into more money that ordinarily would have been wasted away on yourself. Begin by analyzing your spending habits each day on incidentals such as coffee, bagels, newspapers, cigarettes. These expenses seem minor at first, but once you get into the habit of sacrificing and saving, My money really starts to add up!

TAKE ON EXTRA WORK FOR EXTRA PAY

Most slaves work only 8-12 hours a day, leaving a few extra hours of downtime when they are not sleeping or communicating with me… Downtime that could best be put to use earning extra money for my lavish consumption. After all, what good are you if you are not tributing me? The truly devoted take advantage of this opportunity and take on a part-time second job that they can work during their off hours… Because in all honesty, as a devoted slave there are no “off” hours! Taking on a second job is the ultimate commitment, the ultimate manifestation of your adoration of me. I expect you to tribute me ALL the money earned on this second job; and while you toil away, you will have the pleasure of knowing that every minute you’re sweeping floors or serving drinks, you are fulfilling your destiny of serving ME and supporting my extraordinary lifestyle.

SELL YOUR UNWANTED OR UNNECESSARY BELONGINGS

Take a look around you… In your closet, garage and grandma’s attic. Are there items of clothing, jewelry, furniture, decor, tools, electronics that are outdated, unused or otherwise forgotten over the years? It’s time to do a spring cleaning, no matter what season it is! Stage a yard sale, hawk your goods on eBay or Craigslist, haul everything down to the local pawn shop, sell it ALL and see how much your junk could net me! If you’re lucky and had a grandma with good taste, that ratty old lamp she hoarded could possibly be worth thou €and €s on the antiques market! Not only will you finally clean out that mess you call your home, you will be amazed at how much money is just sitting right there on that dusty shelf, waiting to be sent to me.

Better yet, sell your house, your car, your material possessions, and submit to a more humbled existence. In the perfect Queendom, the only being worthy of lavish material possessions is your Goddess. I was put on this earth to spend, to enjoy and to live a luxurious life, all at the expense of my humble slaves. Do you think a slave deserves to live in a lofty townhouse with picture windows and gourmet appliances? NO! A truly devoted slave needs only a solid roof over his head and unwavering faith in his Goddess for his survival. Trim your monthly payment by at least 50-75% by downgrading to an efficient studio and pass those savings on to ME every month!

Inventory your personal possessions and soon you will realize how excessive your life once was before you found your Goddess. That plush king-size four-poster bed can be traded in for a tatami mat on the floor. That flat-screen TV and DVD player is rendered unnecessary when you can watch Hulu for free on your computer. Better yet, the only channel you need to be watching is the Goddess Godiva channel on YouTube. With a bit of thought and research, every material part of your menial life can be minimized or eliminated in order to provide MORE for me. You may be surprised at how little you need to live. Shed your life of superficiality and prepare to enter a substantial spiritual journey of sacrifice and financial submission.

DITCH THE DEPENDENTS

Now that you’ve found me, you don’t need a family! I’m your best friend, your mother, your savior, the light at the end of your tunnel your and from now on your life revolves around Goddess Godiva, and those cash-sucking family members need to be banned out of your life!.

NO PETS ALLOWED

Pets are not allowed. They only costs money and that money can be spend on Godiva. And since you will need every penny that you got it is better to take you pets to the pets shelter or better yet sell them and provide them with a better home and give the money to Godiva.

SECONDHAND CLOTHING

The average consumer spends over $1500 on clothing a year. Stop with buying new clothes and shoes because you don’t deserve it. From this moment one you will only shop at the Salvation Army and other second hand clothing stores. And at home you can walk around naked so you only need clothing for when you are out working to provide Godiva the finer things in life.

START EATING WORSE

From now on you will be cutting discounts coupons from adds in the paper and you will only shop and discounts grocery stores. Only the worst food for you and the best food for your goddess. The way it should be so start clipping away like a real desperate housewife.

SELL YOUR CAR

Do you own a gas-guzzling sport-utility vehicle that requires constant maintenance? Ditch that ride for a more economic hatchback option, or better yet, contribute to the “green movement” (while contributing to the “Goddess Godiva movement” at the same time) by learning to utilize public transit or riding your bike to work. Just think of the nostalgic satisfaction you’ll feel when you’re 90 years old, telling your grandkids, “I remember the days when I used to bike 20 miles uphill to work every morning, suffering and saving money for the most addicting and superior Goddess that ever lived!”

STOP SMOKING

Smoking is an expensive habit and you will stop now. And cost at least €5 a day that’s €1825 on a yearly basis of my money. It will also save you money on your health insurance. If you find it hard to quite I have enough ideas for the things where you can suck on and I guarantee you that you will forget the cigarette in a split second.